Good morning ladies and gentleman.
After being away in Greece for a week or so i basically disappeared from Thinking Evolution. Nonetheless, I’m back, so let us carry on through our discussions of life and love, contemplating all it has to throw at us. Holidays seem to be a random time for reflection and contemplation, considering what i want from my life, from my required job that i’m supposed to want to do, to go and live the life that has already been mapped out in a society which is like “this” and there is nothing we can do about it. Usually resulting in us missing how utterly outstanding things can be, from people and ideas, to how wonderfully beautiful the world can be.
Thinking about this did create something though. Its almost as if we crave the future, we long to see whats going to happen and prepare for any eventuality or emotion we may have to deal with. We concentrate on the future so much it seems like we can ignore everything else going on. Its almost as if we consider the past irrelevant, as “I can’t change it or do anything about it- so why waste time thinking about it?” Why do we consider thinking about past events and decisions a wasteful process? I’m not saying for a second we should sit around all day consider the opportunities we may have missed, living in the past realm of dreary regret, because fuck that would make us all extremely miserable. The world is a depressing place in this day and age, we don’t need that on top of it.
As i have said time and time before, the past decisions and events of your days well spent will shape and design what we consider meaningful and relevant to us in the future. The past life we have lead has to play its part, as does the way we live at this particular moment. We have to be aware of what happened in the past and understand what is going on right now. This way, in my opinion, its going to be much easier for us to move forward. Without this balance, this obsession with the future can lead to us living in the past, not liking how the future looks, so we think about the past and misery of regret, be it missing out on a good business opportunity, a potential relationship, even something as simple as forming a partnership with someone you see to be utterly outstanding, only to at the time wave from the bank of the river as it floated on by.
Its a stupid thing really, as thinking about it, in today’s dysfunctional world of supposed “relevant ” choices, we really suck at making choices. We don’t seem that bothered about losing something wonderful, or gaining something wonderful, but much more interested in having everything. We don’t want to have to choose, so we end up greedy, scared even that if we lean one way, then we might be missing out on something that would actually mean something to us, but if we lean the other way, it could be horrible and the “I might have to go through the pain and displeasure of dealing with something or someone I’m uncomfortable around” and wouldn’t that be just dreadful.
We want both things, and because we feel like we are “owed” something, we are going to do all we can to get it. Its almost like a modern day laziness, or maybe fear, we all suffer from. We don’t like to make decisions, so try to do the best we can to get as close as we can to getting both options, only for the net result to be getting half of what we hoped to achieve. so we have missed out twice as much because we were scared of feeling regret and loss from missing out on something, only to feel the regret twice as much because we didn’t really do anything. Its an endless cycle.
Then from not doing anything we end up settling, assuming the world is the way it is and there’s “nothing i can do about it- I tried and nothing happened.” So we end up living in regret, in the things we didn’t try, thinking about how we didn’t get to be a part of the moments that can make your heart beat so fast and give you such butterflies, expectant and so fucking joyful of how wonderful things could be.
So would you change your regrets- remove them even- if you could? If somehow, you had the opportunity to send yourself a letter five years in the past, what would that letter say? Would you explain what you should do in those decisions- do what you can to experience what you missed? What would you tell them about their lives 5 years in the future? Would you want to send a letter at all?
I think i would send a letter. What i would write is another matter entirely.
Dam its good to be back.
Until next time. DR
PS: I’m working on updating the site and working on the subscription aspects, so please be patient as i hope to get it done soon. Also I’m considering modifying the scheduling of these posts. Any opinions would be appreciated.
Random motivation picture.