The Thing about life is…

Good evening ladies and gentleman

The thing about life is…

I’ve been throwing this phrase about for months now. It plays through my mind endlessly, over and over… five little words that are so powerful, yet so bleak and scary, beautiful, wistful, wonderful, so entrenched in darkness and saturated in the amber glow of a summer morning.

The thing about life is…

How does one even finish that sentence?Let alone writing a sentence, a paragraph, a page or a novel on the idea, how does one even understand it?

How do you understand life? You don’t know anything about something if you don’t at least try to understand it surely? We spend so long lost in ideas, but they are never our ideas. We live in ideas of love, ideas of connection, of pain- of passion. Even sex has become so obsolete to so many because we are so terrified of what we want, scarier still because we don’t even know what we want.

For months this phrase has plagued me, over and over i say those five little words and haven’t been able to find the words to finish that sentence in any meaningful way. You could wander into that cliche of understanding life with the phrase “I love you” and when you are upset with them you fall full circle to “fuck you.”

It can facilitate darkness, misery and depression, has the means to create any sort of wander, joy, happiness basking in its own powerful glow. The thing about life is one thing. One thing only.

What do you desire…and how far are you willing to go to get it? Moreover than writing, painting, running, fighting, building, directing, destroying, its anything. The thing you’re confused by, the thing that creates a joy in your heart and leaves you yearning for its warm comfort when the painful, sad, boring mediocrity of life tries to grasp your neck and choke the very life out of you.

When the voice in your head is screaming at you, when it says that you’re ugly, that you can’t be yourself, that you shouldn’t paint, that your friends are better looking than you, that you don’t have a nice car or don’t see the point of carrying on in the life that your living, look to the thing you turn to.

Look to it and listen, please listen. You need that part of you, or joy, real joy will never reveal itself to you. The world is exhausting, so exhausting. It’s full of loud noises, scary thoughts and ideas that so many people spend their entire lives avoiding. Don’t be them. You aren’t them.

You are so much more.

Be the one thing in life that scares you. Scares you to the point where you want to hide at the bottom of a bottle or at the end of the shotgun barrel. Resist society, resist existence, and then your life is truly yours once again.

Break through the wall, never return through it, and do the only thing worth doing. The thing about life is… its so fucking difficult to be you- but if you find them, and few people do.

It will be beautiful.

Yours, with love as always.
D. R x

Photo by Andrew Neel

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